Married Couples and Sleeping Together

Married Couples and Sleeping Together Relationships Spouses & Partners Print Solutions for Married Couple Sleep Problems By Sheri Stritof Sheri Stritof has written about marriage and relationships for 20 years. Shes the co-author of The Everything Great Marriage Book. Learn about our editorial policy Sheri Stritof Medically reviewed by Medically reviewed by Carly Snyder, MD on January 28, 2020 facebook twitter linkedin Carly Snyder, MD is a reproductive and perinatal psychiatrist who combines traditional psychiatry with integrative medicine-based treatments.   Learn about our Medical Review Board Carly Snyder, MD on January 28, 2020 Steven Errico/ / Getty Images More in Relationships Spouses & Partners Marital Problems LGBTQ Violence and Abuse Many marriage experts believe that peaceful sleeping together can keep a marriage healthy.?? Why do people share a bed with a spouse if they would sleep better if they didnt? Usually, the answer is because even if you dont get the best nights sleep, you find comfort and emotional intimacy in sleeping together. What If You and Your Spouse Dont Sleep Well Together? What if you cant sleep well with your spouse? You are not alone. Many married couples have problems sleeping together. If you are having difficulty getting a good nights sleep because of your spouses sleeping habits, consider getting twin beds or, in the case of snoring, sleeping in separate bedrooms may be the best solution. Sleeping Together Statistics According to a 2001 survey by the National Sleep Foundation, more than one in ten (12%) married Americans sleep alone.?? Additionally, Lower marital satisfaction impacts sleep habits according to the poll. Almost one-half of those with less marital satisfaction (47%) say they are sleeping less today than five years ago and more than three-quarters are more likely to experience a sleep problem than their more happily married counterparts (77% vs. 69%). To no ones surprise, the poll also showed that there were more sleep problems in households with children. Married people with children average less sleep during the week than those without children (6.7 vs. 7.2 hours/night), and single people without children (7.1 hours). More than one in ten married adults (12%) with children reports typically sleeping with a child; a vast majority of these adults (81%) reports a sleep problem. Common Reasons for Sleep Problems Here are situations that can create sleep problems for couples. Disagreement about who gets which side of the bedDiffering sleep positionsThe temperature of the roomTo cuddle or not to cuddleSheet texturesAlarmsTossing and turningTeeth grindingDegree of quietnessGetting up in the middle of the nightThe size of the bedThe firmness of the bedSnoringHaving a window openSleeping with children or petsNightmaresGoing to bed angrySleepwalkingAmount of pillowsNumber of blanketsSpousal arousal syndromeTime to go to bedWhen to get up in the morningInsomnia Sleep Positions When you can sleep together, many sleep experts recommend spooning.?? This is the sleeping position where people sleep nestled together like spoons. This sleeping position is believed to increase intimacy and lower stress. Sometimes people worry because their spouse is sleeping with their back to them or seems to be far away in the bed. Dont jump to conclusions. Although sleep positions can be a red flag in a marriage, experts say there are no good or bad sleep positions in a marriage.??? The Best Solution Is Compromise So, what do you do if you have different sleep preferences? Find ways to compromise. If that doesnt work, be realistic and consider separate bedrooms or twin beds. Separate bedrooms or twin beds can save your marriage. When couples first start sleeping together, they are willing to sacrifice comfort to be close to their partner. After about five years or so, many people just want to have a good nights sleep again.